# You know you've got a red flag customer when.....



## MBS (Mar 20, 2008)

What I hear a lot now is some form of this:
I really need this done and I don't have any money........how do you charge?


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## dkillianjr (Aug 28, 2006)

Thats some good ones guys:laughing:

Another one You show up at a HO's house for an estimate. 
"Hi who are you? I'm Dave I spoke with your wife about a kitchen estimate. Eh, oh oh ok come in. Husband has no clue! Theres a waste of my time:laughing:


Dave


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## Leo G (May 12, 2005)

I saw it at HD for $xxx.xx, why is yours so much? I just want it 2" longer and a different style door......


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## jtpro (May 21, 2009)

"I went to the HD 'class' this last week end and read a magazine article so I WILL be watching you to make sure it's done right."

"If it takes you less time to do it do then you think do I get a break?"

"MY neighbor is a 'jack of all trades' he said he would do it for_______ but 
he is out of town this week and I kinda wanted it done now."

"20 years ago I used to do this for a living so I KNOW how much it SHOULD costs."

In past situations when having to deal with people in residential construction I almost felt compelled to give a small discount at the end for the best most original "negotiation" tactic to date.


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## S Winklepleck (Jul 31, 2009)

"Fixing the dry rot is part of the job, right?"


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## freemason21 (Aug 5, 2009)

I looked at an exterior door a week ago that was pretty good. I told them I could get them a deal on a new exterior door. I came back and told them I had a full view which is what they had, but this new door had the blinds enclosed in the glass. I had a price of about 175 bucks. Everything came with the door other the a door knob. He wanted me to rip out the old door, dispose of it, install the new one, and paint it. Before I was able to give him an estimate (I was going to figure right around 400 dollars for everything) he looks at me and says "so you can do this for about 250 bucks?"  Yeah sure, and your door will be about as leak proof as a strainer.


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## lsdesigns (Nov 2, 2008)

ok fellows,, i just had to say,i wish i would have run from this customer. But i was relatively new,and trying to please a friend(some friend),, i reslated his front porch which was small but done incorrectly originally, as i was finishing up,he asks me what i could do with his lawn.. this is a 3 story townhome,so the lawn was tiny, but it was literally dirt and weeds,, i'm not a landscaper, but i do work design and color.and i told him, i would do what i could,, i laid the grass. built two flower beds,, (the right way)... edged the front of the gate with beautiful purple and green colleas(i think that's what they were called).. saved this huge tree that he hadn't waatered in forever,, it was the most backbreaking work i've ever done,i have a volvo..he has an escalade,not once did he offer to go and help me pick up materials,, and he wondered why i had to make multiple trips to the nursery.. holy moly,i was incredulous.. anyway,,the end result is that it was gorgeous,,his parents came in town,,it was really the prettiest of the 7 townhomes in his little nook,, ok, a month passes,, he tells me, the flowers die, so i at my own cost go and dig up them and replace them,,they die again,, i do it again,, then he says,forget it, just put rocks there,, so i spend 8 hours it 100 degree houston weather, digging out the flower beds,, throwing out all the waste,, laying out weedguard lining and shaping nice squares where i laid on bleached marble rocks,, it looked awesome.. he comes home from golfing(i know,,it gets worse) and he says,, i didn't want them that big,, i just walked away.. so a week goes by,, we went to work out together and he brings me a check,, i don't look at it,,(because up to this point i didn't know how to ask for a fair price,i assumed, with him being a hedge fund guy, and 5 yr freind,he would do right by me,,, well i get in my car,and he had given me 100!,, i was so mad,, i called him,, and he said, what,,do you expect me to pay for the labor on teh flower beds,that i already paid for,, (the flower beds were removed and i laid the rock gardens).. and he says there aer plenty of guys that would be happy to make a hundred dollars a day. i still am mad at this typing,, and to top it off,,this is an ex westpoint guy,, ex profootball.. hedge fund trader,, plenty of money,, 255 pounds,, i'm a interior decorator,with stone and granite experience and love working with my hands,,and i'm a fitness instructor(that's how i know him).. i weight 110.. and i did all the work myself,, that lousy SOB.. ok,,i'm done.(oh i found out later,, his flowers kept dieing,because he didn't water them,, and he blamed that on me too,because he said he wanted low maintenance)omg


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## ChainsawCharlie (Jan 16, 2008)

lsdesigns said:


> ok fellows ...
> 
> ...omg


So, sooooo many thing wrong in there.

And the client is NOT one of them.


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## strathd (Jan 12, 2009)

lsdesigns said:


> ok fellows,, i just had to say,i wish i would have run from this customer. But i was relatively new,and trying to please a friend(some friend),, i reslated his front porch which was small but done incorrectly originally, as i was finishing up,he asks me what i could do with his lawn.. this is a 3 story townhome,so the lawn was tiny, but it was literally dirt and weeds,, i'm not a landscaper, but i do work design and color.and i told him, i would do what i could,, i laid the grass. built two flower beds,, (the right way)... edged the front of the gate with beautiful purple and green colleas(i think that's what they were called).. saved this huge tree that he hadn't waatered in forever,, it was the most backbreaking work i've ever done,i have a volvo..he has an escalade,not once did he offer to go and help me pick up materials,, and he wondered why i had to make multiple trips to the nursery.. holy moly,i was incredulous.. anyway,,the end result is that it was gorgeous,,his parents came in town,,it was really the prettiest of the 7 townhomes in his little nook,, ok, a month passes,, he tells me, the flowers die, so i at my own cost go and dig up them and replace them,,they die again,, i do it again,, then he says,forget it, just put rocks there,, so i spend 8 hours it 100 degree houston weather, digging out the flower beds,, throwing out all the waste,, laying out weedguard lining and shaping nice squares where i laid on bleached marble rocks,, it looked awesome.. he comes home from golfing(i know,,it gets worse) and he says,, i didn't want them that big,, i just walked away.. so a week goes by,, we went to work out together and he brings me a check,, i don't look at it,,(because up to this point i didn't know how to ask for a fair price,i assumed, with him being a hedge fund guy, and 5 yr freind,he would do right by me,,, well i get in my car,and he had given me 100!,, i was so mad,, i called him,, and he said, what,,do you expect me to pay for the labor on teh flower beds,that i already paid for,, (the flower beds were removed and i laid the rock gardens).. and he says there aer plenty of guys that would be happy to make a hundred dollars a day. i still am mad at this typing,, and to top it off,,this is an ex westpoint guy,, ex profootball.. hedge fund trader,, plenty of money,, 255 pounds,, i'm a interior decorator,with stone and granite experience and love working with my hands,,and i'm a fitness instructor(that's how i know him).. i weight 110.. and i did all the work myself,, that lousy SOB.. ok,,i'm done.(oh i found out later,, his flowers kept dieing,because he didn't water them,, and he blamed that on me too,because he said he wanted low maintenance)omg


 How do you expect anyone to read that. LEARN TO USE THE ENTER KEY!!

Paragragh's dude !!!!!!!!!!


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## Magnettica (Dec 19, 2006)

corian27 said:


> My favorite lately is: "You're gonna cut this price waaaaay down cuz of the poor economy, right?"
> 
> Yet, both the homeowners have good jobs, and they're going to Europe on vacation. Go figure


That pisses me off most. I'm on the phone the other day and lady is asking about prices and says, "my husband makes all the final decisions but he's out in the yard in the pool" right now so he'll call you and let you know. 

He's in a swimming pool and I'm renting an apartment.


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## Darwin (Apr 7, 2009)

HO-- "I want you to start monday Morning."

"Great. Your price comes out to x,xxx.xx."

HO-- "Let me call you back Monday morning"

"Is there a problem?"

HO--"Well, no. But, I just need to call you."


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## Cdat (Apr 18, 2007)

Had a friend of the family (wife's side of the family), ask me to stop by and just 'look things over' for him (for free of course since I'm no builder). So, my wife begs and pleads and I promise to swing by and look. This guy is one of those tight wads who is trying to save a penny and spending 5 bucks to do it. No common sense to speak of. He hasn't EVER built anything in his life that I know of.

As you may know, I don't build houses and anything I could help with is basically worthless advice, or so I thought.

Well, I go to the site where he is building his new house, all by himself mind you. I see a massive hole in the ground with the dirt heaped up high right beside it. The side facing the road. I walk around this mound of dirt and see a basement already poured. Something didn't seem right. 

I walked up to the edge and realized that it looked like one of those concrete thingies they put coffins in before burying people. Just a massive concrete box. Now, I don't know shat about this stuff but I could see quite a few 'issues'.

Ol' Warren was downstairs and see'ing me up top, he scurries up the ladder and like a five year old waddles up to me with a shat eating grin and asks what I think?

"Well, where are the basement windows?"

'Uhm..I think I forgot those. Good point.' he whips out a pen and a piece of wrinkled paper and writes this down.

"Where's the plumbing? I can't see it anywhere."

'Uhm, I'm gonna' just run it up over the walls.'

"I'm no expert but I don't think that's allowed, Warren."

"I'm pretty sure, that that has to be in place before you pour the floor."

'Well, can I cut up the floor and get it put in?' he asks.

"I assume you can, don't see why not. Where's the sump?"

'I was gonna' buy that after I had a roof up to protect the electrical.'

"I meant the hole you place the pump in Warren. You also have the lines running around the house to catch the water and direct it into the sump."

Warren is busy writing stuff down.

I inform him, I'll check back later to see how things are going. I hadn't heard from Warren in a bit so I swung by the site. Don't know what happened but there's tape stretched around the property now and the hole is pretty much filled in. Seems that Warren bit off more then he could chew.


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## J F (Dec 3, 2005)

:laughing:


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## J F (Dec 3, 2005)

Darwin said:


> HO-- "I want you to start monday Morning."
> 
> "Great. Your price comes out to x,xxx.xx."
> 
> ...


k

another kiss of death (usually)


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## mikeswoods (Oct 11, 2008)

*What????*

I'm sorry, I can't pay the whole thing right now. My husband had to buy a new car.


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## MBS (Mar 20, 2008)

Two days ago I'm talking to a guy I had just finished some work for and his brother comes up to me and says, "I think I'll have you come over and give me a couple of bids just for the hell of it." :shutup:


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## JumboJack (Aug 14, 2007)

lsdesigns said:


> ok fellows,, i just had to say,i wish i would have run from this customer. But i was relatively new,and trying to please a friend(some friend),, i reslated his front porch which was small but done incorrectly originally, as i was finishing up,he asks me what i could do with his lawn.. this is a 3 story townhome,so the lawn was tiny, but it was literally dirt and weeds,, i'm not a landscaper, but i do work design and color.and i told him, i would do what i could,, i laid the grass. built two flower beds,, (the right way)... edged the front of the gate with beautiful purple and green colleas(i think that's what they were called).. saved this huge tree that he hadn't waatered in forever,, it was the most backbreaking work i've ever done,i have a volvo..he has an escalade,not once did he offer to go and help me pick up materials,, and he wondered why i had to make multiple trips to the nursery.. holy moly,i was incredulous.. anyway,,the end result is that it was gorgeous,,his parents came in town,,it was really the prettiest of the 7 townhomes in his little nook,, ok, a month passes,, he tells me, the flowers die, so i at my own cost go and dig up them and replace them,,they die again,, i do it again,, then he says,forget it, just put rocks there,, so i spend 8 hours it 100 degree houston weather, digging out the flower beds,, throwing out all the waste,, laying out weedguard lining and shaping nice squares where i laid on bleached marble rocks,, it looked awesome.. he comes home from golfing(i know,,it gets worse) and he says,, i didn't want them that big,, i just walked away.. so a week goes by,, we went to work out together and he brings me a check,, i don't look at it,,(because up to this point i didn't know how to ask for a fair price,i assumed, with him being a hedge fund guy, and 5 yr freind,he would do right by me,,, well i get in my car,and he had given me 100!,, i was so mad,, i called him,, and he said, what,,do you expect me to pay for the labor on teh flower beds,that i already paid for,, (the flower beds were removed and i laid the rock gardens).. and he says there aer plenty of guys that would be happy to make a hundred dollars a day. i still am mad at this typing,, and to top it off,,this is an ex westpoint guy,, ex profootball.. hedge fund trader,, plenty of money,, 255 pounds,, i'm a interior decorator,with stone and granite experience and love working with my hands,,and i'm a fitness instructor(that's how i know him).. i weight 110.. and i did all the work myself,, that lousy SOB.. ok,,i'm done.(oh i found out later,, his flowers kept dieing,because he didn't water them,, and he blamed that on me too,because he said he wanted low maintenance)omg


HOLY GIANT PARAGRAPH BATMAN!!!:batman:





...btw....worst first post ever....sorry


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## Warren (Feb 19, 2005)

Cdat said:


> Had a friend of the family (wife's side of the family), ask me to stop by and just 'look things over' for him (for free of course since I'm no builder). So, my wife begs and pleads and I promise to swing by and look. This guy is one of those tight wads who is trying to save a penny and spending 5 bucks to do it. No common sense to speak of. He hasn't EVER built anything in his life that I know of.
> 
> As you may know, I don't build houses and anything I could help with is basically worthless advice, or so I thought.
> 
> ...



Not this Warren! Just wanted to clear that up for everybody.


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## Cdat (Apr 18, 2007)

Nope. Warren was a banker. We still don't know who poured the walls and floor. No one will fess up.

Anyho, the next story you are about to hear is true. The names have been changed to protect the guilty...

*Me:* “Thank you for calling Cdat's Unique Creations, how can I help you?”
*Customer:* “Yes, I have a problem with you guys! You are trying to **** me over!”
*Me:* “Ok, what seems to be the problem?”
*Customer:* “I am trying to buy a house. Your company is showing a unpaid bill for $7000, and my bank has denied my loan because of this.”
*Me:* “Well, according to our records you purchased a wall mural two years ago with a down payment of $3500. You made two payments of $200 and never made another payment.”
*Customer:* “Yeah, so?”
*Me:* “Well, you never paid for the item so we reported it as such.”
*Customer:* “But I sold that house a year and a half ago!”
*Me:* “But you never paid for the item we custom built for you.”
*Customer:* “I KNOW THAT! WHY WOULD I PAY FOR SOMETHING I DON’T OWN! CALL THE NEW OWNERS AND GET YOUR MONEY, AND GET THIS OFF MY CREDIT REPORT!”
*Me:* “I am sorry, but we agreed to extend credit to you, not the new owners of the house. You signed the agreement, not them.”
*Customer:* “Where am I supposed to get $7000?”
*Me:* “I’m sorry, but all I can think of is when you got the money for selling the home with the mural, you should have paid the account balance off.”
*Customer:* “I TOLD YOU I AM NOT GOING TO PAY FOR SOMETHING I DON’T HAVE!”
*Me: *"Well, I guess that about raps up this call."
*Customer:* "Don't you ****ing hang up on me you lousy **** sucker!"
*Me: *"Excuse me? What did you just say?"
*Customer:* "Don't **** with me mother ****!"
*Me:* "Keep your mother off the streets and I won't **** her."
*Customer:* "If I hear....wait.....what the **** did you just say about my mother, you **** sucking *******?!?"
*Me:* *Click* hanging up phone. A couple of minutes go by and the phone rings.
*Me:* " Cdat's Mortuary. You stab 'em, we slab 'em."
*Customer:* "Uhm....you that Cdat guy from Cdat's Unique Creations?"
*Me:* "Speaking."
*Customer:* "Man, you don't talk smack about my mom. That ain't right, you sorry piece of..." 
*Me:* *Click* Hangs up phone. A minute or two passes. Telephone rings.
*Me:* "Cdat's Unique Creations. This line is unsecure. How may I help you Sir or Ma'am?"
Customer: "Hey man, I'm sorry."
*Me:* "Apology accepted."
*Customer:* "Apology? I ain't ****ing apologizing for nothing."
*Me:* "You returned the call and stated you're sorry. That, I do believe is an apology."
*Customer:* "No it ain't. I'm sorry for blowing up at you. But I ain't sorry for the way I said it!"
*Me:* “Okay, then I guess this call is over and I hope you get your bank to loan you the money.” *Customer:* “So you fixed it?”
*Me:* “I sure did. Have a great day.”


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## CTDiesel (May 13, 2009)

Had a guy tell me he was going to give me cash for a job and that I WOULD give him a break, pretty much told me he's not paying full price. He did anyway in the end.


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## CarrPainting (Jun 29, 2010)

CScalf said:


> I know this is an old thread, but there is some funny stuff in it...it should be a sticky!


So let me get this straight.. You have spammed every thread on here and are now digging up stuff to spam as well :whistling




> Me too. I just had a blast reading all *ten* pages.


Who taught you how to count? :laughing:

My best from last summer 

"what do you mean you have to charge a surcharge for fuel? Why can't you bring everything you need to paint my 3 story house with a car and a small trailer? It's much more efficient than that big truck you have.."

Mind you I don't even OWN a car.. I barrowed my mothers cause it was a referral from one of my best customers... It was Sunday.. Nice day. (job was 70 miles away round trip). Best part is, I couldn't leave my truck there overnight :laughing:


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## jgar (Dec 20, 2010)

Very entertaining thread.
A prospective customer told me I better sharpen my pencil because his wife just bought a new volvo suv. :laughing:


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## fireguy (Oct 29, 2006)

CrpntrFrk said:


> I will need that itemized with each price listed.


After you have sent the estimate to them.


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## Brutus (May 29, 2007)

CarrPainting said:


> Who taught you how to count? :laughing:


Mobile app has less posts per page. That's probably my guess.


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## realelectrician (Jul 13, 2011)

"I was going to do it myself but don't have the time" me - neither do I.

"You charge that! I don't even make that much an hour" me - neither do I.


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## CarpenterSFO (Dec 12, 2012)

Anyone who tells me to sharpen my pencil.


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## dkillianjr (Aug 28, 2006)

CarpenterSFO said:


> Anyone who tells me to sharpen my pencil.



I was having one of those days a year or so ago, I was in a bad mood already. I went to a guys house to deliver the estimate. I really didn't want the job, but I needed the work. He looked at it and said just that. I pulled the pencil I had in my pocket out and said "you know what, your right I have a sharpener in the truck. Let me know if you want the work done" Then just took off.

Dave


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## littlefred811 (Dec 16, 2012)

corian27 said:


> My favorite lately is: "You're gonna cut this price waaaaay down cuz of the poor economy, right?"
> 
> Yet, both the homeowners have good jobs, and they're going to Europe on vacation. Go figure


These days, I tend to tell them "Yes," The I add about 20% the overall price.


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